The Politics of Ambition: How Women Can Claim Power Without Paying the Price

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Welcome to Own Your Ambition, the weekly newsletter designed to give professional women the tools they need to be successful. As a former CEO who made it to the C Suite from an entry level, I know first hand what it takes for women to realize their ambition and reach their career goals.

In this newsletter, I’ll unpack the politics of ambition for women, the ways ambition is coded, rewarded, and weaponized, particularly for women in the workplace.

I’ll look at how ambitious women have been perceived historically, what’s changed (and what hasn’t), and how to strategically harness ambition today without compromise and without backlash.

I look forward to your comments and learning about your experiences in the workplace owning your ambition.

For generations, women have been told to want more, do more, be more. We are encouraged to dream big, lean in, break glass ceilings. And yet, the moment we demonstrate ambition, the very trait required to achieve those dreams, we’re often met with suspicion, resistance, or even punishment.

Ambition is complicated for women. It doesn’t operate on a level playing field. While ambition in men is seen as natural, even admirable, ambition in women still triggers discomfort. We admire it in theory, but resent it in practice. Why? Because ambition is tied to power. And women’s pursuit of power continues to upend the traditional norms of gender, leadership, and influence.

The Historical Baggage of Female Ambition

Throughout history, women who have dared to claim public space, power, or authority have been cast as dangerous, deviant, or delusional.

Think of Cleopatra, portrayed for centuries not as a strategic ruler but as a seductress. Or Joan of Arc, who was burned at the stake in part for her defiance of traditional female roles. Fast forward to more modern figures—Hillary Clinton, labeled “calculating” and “cold,” or Sheryl Sandberg, criticized for pushing women to lean into a system that wasn’t built for them.

What these women have in common isn’t their careers, backgrounds, or politics. It’s ambition, and how threatening that ambition becomes when it belongs to a woman.

Psychological research backs this up. In a now-famous 2003 study by Harvard Business School professors examined reactions to a case study of a successful venture capitalist named Heidi Roizen. When students read about her as “Heidi,” they respected her competence but didn’t like her. When the same story was attributed to “Howard,” they liked him and respected him. The only difference? Gender.

This isn’t just history! It’s the architecture of our workplace reality.

How Ambitious Women Are Still Perceived Today

Despite the progress of recent decades, women’s ambition continues to be met with a double standard. An ambitious woman might be called aggressive, abrasive, or self-promoting. A man with the same behaviors is called a leader.

This tension is rooted in what social psychologists call role incongruity. We associate leadership with assertiveness, decisiveness, and dominance, traits traditionally coded as masculine. We associate femininity with warmth, empathy, and supportiveness. When women behave in ways that contradict those expectations, they violate social norms and trigger backlash.

Ambition, in this context, becomes a catch-22. If women express it openly, they risk being disliked and penalized. If they suppress it, they risk invisibility.

And for women of color, the stakes are even higher. Studies show that Black and Latina women face additional scrutiny, often having their ambition interpreted as anger or entitlement.

The Perceived Link Between Ambition and Power

Why does ambition provoke such a reaction? Because it signals a desire for power, and power remains one of the most gendered, guarded currencies in our society.

Ambition is not just about wanting more; it’s about wanting to matter. To be influential. To shape outcomes. And women’s access to that kind of influence is still considered transgressive.

When a woman says, “I want to be CEO,” or “I want that promotion,” she’s not just articulating a career goal. She’s challenging the idea that power belongs to someone else. That’s why ambition is political. Not in the partisan sense, but in the sense that it challenges existing power structures and expectations.

The Risk of Suppressing Ambition

In trying to avoid backlash, many women downplay their ambition. They wait to be noticed. They assume good work will speak for itself. They don’t ask for what they want.

But here’s the problem: suppressing ambition doesn’t just limit your potential, it limits your visibility, your access to opportunities, and ultimately, your power to shape your own path.

In corporate settings, this plays out in who gets leadership roles, who gets stretch assignments, who gets mentored. Ambition fuels all of these. Without it, without naming it, claiming it, and owning it, we remain sidelined.

Ambition, when hidden, becomes a silent tax on success.

How Ambitious Women Can Lead Without Backlash

So what’s the solution? How can ambitious women navigate these double binds without compromising who they are?

The key is strategic ambition.

It’s not about being less ambitious—it’s about being more intentional with how you demonstrate and communicate it.

Here are five strategies that help ambitious women thrive without triggering backlash:

1. Reframe Ambition as Purpose

Instead of framing your ambition as personal gain (“I want to rise”), frame it in terms of impact (“I want to make a difference”).

Research shows that when women express ambition as a desire to help others—teams, customers, missions—they are more likely to be accepted and respected. That doesn’t mean hiding your goals. It means situating them in a broader vision.

Say this: “I’m interested in leading this initiative because I see a way to improve how we serve our clients.”
Not just: “I want to lead this because it would be a great opportunity for me.”

2. Build Allies Who Champion You

Self-advocacy is critical, but so is social proof. When others speak to your ambition and capability, it neutralizes the perception that you’re self-promoting.

Seek out sponsors, senior leaders who are willing to advocate for your advancement. Cultivate relationships with peers who can amplify your contributions in rooms you’re not in.

3. Claim Your Wins Strategically

There’s a myth that “humility” means staying silent. But visibility is essential to advancement. The trick is to share your wins in a way that ties your success to outcomes, teamwork, or shared goals.

Example: “I’m proud that our team hit our targets this quarter. I led the strategy sessions and coordinated execution across departments.”

This positions you as both results-oriented and collaborative, two things that counter negative stereotypes.

4. Lead with Emotional Intelligence

Ambition doesn’t require aggression. In fact, combining ambition with empathy and emotional intelligence can make you a more influential leader.

Research shows that when women pair assertiveness with warmth—by actively listening, showing appreciation, or mentoring others, they are more likely to be seen as competent and likable.

Don’t confuse kindness with weakness. Use both.

5. Know the System. Then Work It

Finally, understand that organizational politics exist. You don’t have to play dirty, but you do have to play smart. That means understanding the unwritten rules, reading the power dynamics in a room, and knowing how decisions really get made.

Ambition without political savvy is like a race car with no fuel. You might have the drive, but you won’t get very far.

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Ambition Is Not a Dirty Word

Ambition isn’t something women need to apologize for. It’s not unfeminine. It’s not selfish. It’s a signal of vision, determination, and leadership. And in a world that still resists powerful women, ambition is an act of courage.

The politics of ambition aren’t going away. But we can choose how we show up. We can rewrite the rules. We can be unapologetic in our goals and strategic in our approach.

Not for permission, but for progress.

So, to every woman reading this who has been told to “slow down,” “stay in her lane,” or “wait her turn”: don’t dim your ambition to fit in. Learn to wield it wisely and use it to light the path for others.

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I’d love to hear your thoughts: How have you experienced the politics of ambition in your career?

Have you ever felt the need to hide or shrink your goals?

What strategies have helped you navigate it?

Comment below. I read every response!