What on earth are we teaching girls?

How a trip to the toy store motivated one woman to challenge the toy industry, the patriarchy, and societal norms.

Welcome to Own Your Ambition, the weekly newsletter designed to give professional women the tools they need to be successful. As a former CEO who made it to the C Suite from an entry level, I know first hand what it takes for women to realize their ambition and reach their career goals.

Gender bias and stereotypes are deeply ingrained in our patriarchal society. As a result, women have traditionally been undervalued and relegated to support roles over leadership positions in favor of men. Though we have seen some slow progress, the systemic bias women face is still prevalent in the workplace.

Where does the bias all start? Certainly at any early age with messages from our family, friends, and teachers but especially with toys, advertising, and media.

This week’s newsletter addresses how the toy industry perpetuates gender bias and stereotypes and how one woman, Jodi Bondi Norgaard, made the decision to fight for change in the toy industry and challenge the patriarchy.

Barbie doll

When my children were young, I remember trying to do my best to buy gender neutral toys. My daughter loved playing with stuffed animals more than dolls, and she and her brother, just two years her junior, played for hours with their ‘stuffies’. But she still loved dresses and pretty things, and my son, despite my efforts to encourage gender neutral activities, naturally gravitated to building with blocks and trucks.

There is no doubt that toys play a significant role in shaping and reinforcing gender stereotypes, as they often reflect and preserve societal expectations about gender roles. Toys are both a reflection of and a contributor to societal norms, shaping children’s understanding of what is “acceptable” for their gender. This perpetuates stereotypes across generations.

Beyond the simple color coding of pink toys for girls and blue for boys, toys encourage gender specific skills such as spatial and problem-solving skills like LEGO and construction toys for boys, and social and emotional skills for girls such as parental and caregiving role-playing.

Toys also reinforce gender stereotypes in career expectations where ‘doctor kits’ and ‘tool kits’ are frequently marketed to boys and caregiving toys such as baby dolls and toy strollers targeted at girls. The marketing campaigns for these toys give strong messages and reinforce a gender-based narrative.

Jodi Bondi Norgaard’s life changed when shopping with her nine-year-old daughter for a friend’s birthday gift. Her daughter Grace, still flushed and fresh off the soccer field with her shin guards and messy pigtails, immediately went to the doll aisle to find something special for her friend.

Norgaard was horrified at what she saw. “These dolls wore belly-baring tops, high heels, and heavy make-up, and the hangtag read, ‘Lovely Lola’, ‘Dazzlin Destiny’, ‘Cute Candy’, and ‘Sizzlin Sue’”.

Norgaard shared, “These weren’t just toys – they were symbols of the narrow, hypersexualized ideals being marketed to young girls. It hit me like a lightning bolt: this was part of a larger culture that devalued girls for who they were and focused instead on how they looked.”

“Our culture loves to talk about empowering women and girls,” Norgaard commented. “The buzzwords are everywhere: confidence, equality, breaking barriers. But when it comes to translating those words into action, there’s hesitation. There’s fear. Too often, we cower at the edge of meaningful implementation, clinging to old patterns and comfortable norms instead of embracing the bold steps needed to create real progress.”

But that moment in the toy store, Norgaard knew that she could do something about it. “I saw the glaring need for a doll that wasn’t just another ‘pretty face’ but a reflection of how real girls live, play and grow.”

Motivated to change the narrative, Norgaard decided to create a sports-themed doll that celebrates strength, skill, and confidence; a doll that didn’t ask girls to focus on what their bodies looked like but inspired them to marvel at what their bodies could do.

“What if we gave girls a doll that celebrated their abilities rather than their appearance? A doll that said, you are strong. You are capable. You can lead. Imagine the ripple effect. A girl that might hold that doll and see herself differently – not as someone who must conform to society expectations, but as someone who can break them.”

Norgaard’s book, More Than a Doll: How Creating a Sports Doll Turned into a Fight to End Gender Stereotypes, follows her attempt to shake-up the toy industry and fight the patriarchal culture that perpetuates gender roles. Fueled by passion, Norgaard’s persistence and determination, challenged the status quo, and after many trials and tribulations, successfully launched the award-wining Go Go Sports Doll , with accompanying books and apps.

“The toy industry with its relentless focus on princesses, fashion, and beauty, has quietly shaped how girls see themselves and how society sees them. These toys tell a singular story: that a girl’s value lies in how she looks, not in what she can do.

I’m not against princesses or fashion. But when these are the only options, we’re limiting our girl’s imaginations and reinforcing a culture that reduces their potential. Why then are we surprised when girls drop out of sports, lose confidence during puberty, or hesitate to take up space in fields dominated by men.”

Norgaard continued. “True equality starts with the stories we tell our children and the opportunities we give them to explore who they are and what they can become. By nurturing the possibilities early on, we plant the seeds for a more equitable and empowered future for all.”

When children are discouraged from playing with toys not marketed to their gender, it can limit their exploration of diverse interests and talents, potentially stifling creativity and self-expression.

For example, boys may avoid dolls or caregiving toys for fear of judgement, missing opportunities to develop empathy and social skills, while girls may avoid STEM focused toys, impacting their confidence in those areas.

Toys, books, and media are more than just entertainment. They’re powerful tools that shape a child’s understanding of the world and their place in it. According to Norgaard, “Early experiences lay the foundation for how children see themselves and others, influencing their aspirations, opportunities and choices throughout life.

These formative influences ripple outward, affecting workforce diversity, economic strength, community and political leadership, household dynamics, and ultimately, the progress of gender equality. When we provide children with diverse, creative, and inclusive play options, we foster the belief that everyone – regardless of gender – can dream boldly, achieve freely, and lead confidently.”

Jodi’s story is an inspiration for all women to challenge the status quo, the patriarchy and societal norms.

As a toy industry thought leader, Jodi was invited by the White House under the Obama administration to participate in conferences on breaking down gender stereotypes in media and toys. She currently serves on the White House Gender Policy Council collaborating on policy as it relates to children’s toys, content, and publishing. ​​

In 2023, she worked with the Geena Davis Institute on Gender in Media on a groundbreaking report, Equal Play? Analyzing Gender Stereotypes, Diversity, and Inclusion in Advertising and Marketing of Toys. She is a DEIB consultant specializing in gender equality and spearheaded and co-chaired the first Toy Association DEIB Committee to expand play.

Pick up a copy of Norgaard’s book, More Than a Doll!

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