Redefining Balance: How Ambitious Women Can Thrive Without Burning Out

Welcome to Own Your Ambition, the weekly newsletter designed to give professional women the tools they need to be successful. As a former CEO who made it to the C Suite from an entry level, I know first hand what it takes for women to realize their ambition and reach their career goals.

But reaching those goals is often not achieved without stress and sacrifice to our mental health. I’ve struggled with work-life balance my whole career. As a young single mom with two school-aged children, work-life balance was unimaginable. After my divorce, I had to pay the bills, I had deadlines to meet, soccer practice to make, cookies to bake :) and having a ‘life’ beyond that with free time was out of the question.

In this week’s newsletter, I talk honestly about the intersection of ambition and balance.

How can ambitious women manage work-life balance in a way that sustains both their goals and their well-being? Is it even possible?

For many professional women, “work-life balance” sounds like some crazy ass unattainable dream, beautiful in theory, yet elusive in reality. Today, the tension between ambition and well-being has never been more palpable. High-achieving women are navigating increasingly complex terrain: climbing the ladder, leading teams, caring for families along with domestic responsibilities, building relationships, and chasing dreams, often all at once.

The ambition is there. The capability is undeniable. But the systems? They’re still catching up. And as a result, many women are opting out, and it’s not because they lack drive, but because the burnout feels insurmountable.

The Ambition-Balance Dilemma

Ambition used to be synonymous with sacrifice. Want to succeed? Then sleep less, hustle more, and outwork everyone. For women, this message came with added layers: Be likable. Be polite. Don’t ask for too much. Don’t outshine. The result? An exhausting performance that leaves many talented women stretched thin, emotionally drained, and questioning whether it’s worth it.

According to a 2024 Deloitte survey, nearly half (46%) of women say they feel burned out, and 1 in 3 are actively considering leaving their jobs. This is especially pronounced among women in senior leadership roles, where the pressure to “have it all together” is constant and support systems are often lacking.

The LeanIn.org and McKinsey & Company’s Women in the Workplace report echoes this trend, revealing that women leaders are leaving their companies at the highest rate in years, often due to feeling overworked and under-recognized.

These women are not lacking ambition. In fact, they are often the most ambitious, driven, high-performing, and deeply invested in their work. But ambition without sustainable systems is a recipe for exhaustion.

A 2023 study by Gallup found that women are significantly more likely to report high levels of workplace stress compared to men. The key drivers for women include:

• emotional labor and invisible work, at home and at work

• lack of flexible work arrangements

• feeling undervalued or overlooked, especially for leadership roles

• the ‘always on’ expectation drive by remote work culture.

The data is clear! Burnout is not a personal failing. It’s a systemic issue. But there are personal strategies that women can use to navigate this challenging terrain without compromising their ambition.

Redefine What “Balance” Means for You

Let’s toss out the outdated idea that balance means equal time and energy for work, family, friends, self-care, and everything in between. Balance is not about symmetry, it’s about alignment.

What matters most to you?

What phase of life are you in?

What needs your attention right now?

Instead of aiming for a static 50/50 split, think of work-life balance as a dynamic flow. Some seasons will be career-intensive. Others may be focused on family or personal growth. The goal is not perfection, it’s sustainability.

👉 Action Step: Conduct a “values audit.” Identify your top 3 values right now, whether it’s growth, flexibility, financial security, or health. Use those to filter your decisions. If an opportunity doesn’t align, say no.

Set Realistic, Evolving Goals

Ambition without structure can lead to chaos and exhaustion. The key is to set realistic goals that stretch you without overwhelming you. That means breaking big ambitions into smaller, achievable milestones and allowing room for adjustments along the way.

Women often take on too much, too fast, fueled by a desire to prove themselves. We know that the expectation is we need to work twice as hard as our male colleagues to succeed. But success is not a sprint. It’s a strategic marathon.

👉 Action Step: Use the SMART goal framework (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Time-bound) to define your quarterly goals. Then, this is critical, build in pause points to reflect and reassess.

👉 Bonus Tip: Don’t just set “achievement” goals (like a promotion or project completion). Also set process goals, like leaving work by 6 pm, taking a weekly walk, or having one unplugged day per month.

Manage the Perfectionism Trap

I am continually challenged by perfectionism, and after decades, I now understand the stress it causes me and how it positions me for burnout, but for years it was perfectionism that fueled my ambition.

I now get it. We are often praised for our perfectionism. I thrived on the praise. Often, it looks like diligence, accountability and high standards. But in truth, it’s often rooted in fear, fear of failure, rejection, or not being good enough.

Research shows that women are more likely than men to internalize failure and fear making mistakes. For ambitious women like myself, perfectionism can be particularly dangerous. It leads to overwork, micromanagement, imposter syndrome, and a constant sense of falling short. It’s the silent career killer for women.

In a culture that rewards women for being “effortlessly excellent,” perfectionism is not just common, it’s expected. But it’s a recipe for burnout.

👉 Action Step: Start embracing the concept of “good enough.” Admittedly, I continue to be challenged by this, but I realize I sometimes need to give myself permission to take a step back. Choose one weekly task (a presentation, email, or meeting prep) where you consciously aim for excellence without perfection. Then don’t go back to tweak it. (ha! that’s easier said than done, I know!)

👉 Bonus Tip: Track your wins. Start a “Done List” where you write down what you accomplished each day, not just what’s left to do. Ideally, this helps reframe your mindset around sufficiency instead of deficiency.

Honor Your Energy, Not Just Your Time

Time management is essential, but energy management is where true sustainability lies. You may have 8 hours blocked off to work, but if you’re emotionally exhausted, you won’t be productive. Protecting your energy means honoring your bandwidth and building in recovery time.

The pandemic taught us that flexibility matters. So why are so many women still cramming their calendars with back-to-back Zooms and sprinting from one obligation to another?

It’s hard to turn off that drive once you’re in first gear!

👉 Action Step: Track your energy levels for one week. Identify your “power hours” (when you’re most focused) and your “low tide” times. For me, my power hours are first thing in the morning and I adjust my schedule with that knowledge. I start my work very early and after 3 pm I’m often toast. Schedule important work during high-energy windows and reserve low-energy times for admin or rest.

👉 Bonus Tip: For every new commitment you accept, remove one task, meeting, or obligation from your calendar.

Ask for (and Expect) Support

Burnout is not just about doing too much, it’s about doing too much alone. One of the biggest challenges for ambitious women is feeling like they have to “handle everything” without asking for help. This martyr mindset is both unsustainable and unnecessary.

Whether it’s asking your manager for clearer boundaries, hiring help at home, or leaning on your network for guidance, support is a strength, not a weakness.

According to McKinsey’s Women in the Workplace 2023 report, women leaders are twice as likely as men to be “Onlys” in their organization, the only woman in the room or the only person juggling caregiving. These women are also more likely to report burnout, stress, and lack of sponsorship.

👉 Action Step: Identify one area of your life where you could delegate, automate, or outsource. Then do it. Say yes to help, even if it feels uncomfortable.

Know When to Pivot (Not Quit)

Opting out doesn’t always mean giving up. It can mean choosing a different path that better fits your life. Sometimes the job, the industry, or the manager is the problem, not your ambition.

What ambitious women need is not to lower their goals, but to find environments where those goals are nurtured, not punished.

As of 2024, studies show that nearly 30% of women who leave the workforce for “personal reasons” end up launching their own businesses or pivoting into more flexible careers. They’re not giving up, they’re reclaiming control.

👉 Action Step: If you’re on the edge of burnout, conduct a personal SWOT analysis (Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, Threats). Look for ways to realign your work with your values without sacrificing your ambition.

Bottom line: You Can Be Ambitious and Well

Managing work-life balance as an ambitious woman is not about shrinking your goals. It’s about expanding your toolkit. It’s about redefining success on your terms, building boundaries that protect your energy, and remembering that your worth is not tied to your productivity.

Burnout doesn’t mean you’re broken. It means the system is broken, and you’ve been carrying too much of it alone.

So here’s your permission slip:

Say no more often.

Rest without guilt.

Dream bigger, but chase those dreams in a way that includes you in the equation.

Because your ambition is not the problem. It’s part of the solution.